Wish and celebration

I'm not an event person, not my forte, suck on event management, even the small one. Dan aku bukanlah manusia yang suka wish itu dan ini, like birthday etc because I guess, that's how I've been taught growing up. Aku wish untuk yang betul-betul rapat dengan aku je, yang lain, bagi aku, better aku doakan dalam diam.

This made people think that I'm a person with a less feelings inside, which somehow it's true haha. Aku dibesarkan tanpa birthday party etc which is fine by me because age is just a number. As I grew older, I've been surrounded with people who love to celebrate. I'll chip in but never the mastermind, will just follow the flow, contribute money and when the time comes, I'll be there to enjoy the crowd for a while because my body battery sucks at social event. I still feel tired of my wedding day 2 years back hahahaha. 

Aku serabut nak manage and organise. Nak ke sana nak ke sini, I don't like being tired and load my brain with this and that hahaha. Tapi satu benda aku belajar dan cuba belajar; some people need to be celebrated in order for them to feel loved. I didn't deny that even a small celebration can make your day, even your entire year coz the thought that counts kan? But sorry, I dont have energy for that.

I saw people around me constantly celebrate anything around them; birthday, anniversary, promotion, new house, new baby, new cat which is deserves to be celebrated but heyy where did you guys buy that so much energy? haha

Dulu aku pernah tanamkan harapan untuk certain people wish me on certain occasions, just a simple wish, not even a celebration. But it didn't turn up well, and I got frustrated. So after that moment, I get back to my old self, didnt bother about that things, and I'm happier. And I do hope that all people are same with me, do not take heart when I don't wish them tehee. Sometimes I forgot, sometimes I feel lazy to do so hahaha. 

Hari tu time kene covid ramai gila bagi aku warm wishes and some of them even sent me foods, care package (Thank youuu! May Allah repay you guys with abundance of rezq). I feel so touched by their small gesture. Honestly, I'm not that kind of person but I feel I need to be like that. Not a big party, a big helium balloons, a pull out money etc, but just a small one also can touch the heart. I need to be more empathy and loving especially to the ones that I love. I'm far from person with expression but I think I can make it work, a little bit. 

So yeah, good luck! Haha